ja_koniga

Happiness Sold Separately is a book about a twenty-something living in New York City that’s dealing with an ex-boyfriend and works in data entry. Ryan, possibly the most neurotic person ever, reminds me of myself since she’ll come up with fabulous ideas and then stand still while life passes her by. Last night, just as her ex-boyfriend introduced her to the cliché blonde bimbo fiancé, something hit me. It crashed into my chest like an exploding firecracker; ripping apart my intestines like an angry dog.

It was hunger.

Extreme Hunger. The kind of hunger that haunts me every day when I pass by McDonald’s on 700 east. In the kitchen I browsed the dry food shelves and settled on my roommate’s Pop Secret (I promise to replace that. Later.) I shoved the bag into the microwave and set the time for four minutes and stared at the popcorn bag spinning on a small glass plate.

Stared, and waited. I Impatiently waited for the kernels to explode in buttery freshness and cursed thinking how it shouldn’t ever take four minutes for popcorn to pop. I shouldn’t have to put up with this shit! I felt sweaty in anticipation and began pacing the closet-sized kitchen ready to lie on the floor in a two-year old’s tantrum.

And then it became very clear. I am just like my mother. Because if someone had tried to eat some of my popcorn last night I would have screamed, “GET YOUR OWN!”

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