Thanks for visiting. I'm a recent transplant to the Boston Massachusetts area, living with my boyfriend while he completes his MBA. I'm originally from Utah, I like Apple, FileMaker, writing about my feelings, and eating edamame.
Today, I made my last payment to Chase Bank for an ungodly amount of money that could have gone towards many, many corn dogs. This morning I went through my “GET OUT OF DEBT YOU DUMBASS” chart and counted how many payments I made to either a Visa or MasterCard in the last five months. The only reason I’m alive right now is because I took a puff on my inhaler immediately after I counted the very painful twenty-three payments I made to people I’ll never know.
And that’s only Visa and MasterCard payments. I didn’t keep track of my other bank card payments like Firestone, MacMall, GAP, or Old Navy. I think the fact that I’ve made over twenty-three payments in the last five months really deserves an “OH MY GOD” out loud; and weeping over the uneaten corn dogs injected with approximately four ounces of deliciousness.
But I’ve learned a lot through this experience of being utterly poor and feeling like I should belong to a committee of homeless people. And I’ve also done a lot of things this year that I never thought I could, or would do: like paying off my debt before the year 2020; and going to a Therapist to talk about my overwhelming debt and how I should never cry in the fetal position. Ever. Again.
This year has been particularly horrible for me because I’ve felt incredibly angry. Angry about G and the complete lack of drama that surrounded our break-up; angry that I’m stupid with money; angry that I let myself get so dissatisfied with my life. And angry that I couldn’t even grasp enough energy to hang pictures on my wall.
And all at the same time, some of the best things have happened to me. I learned to track my progress. I learned I could talk about the most personal and vulnerable experiences in my life. And I met SML who has been a best friend and more; more in way that I can’t articulate because he has been so incredibly important to me.
In order to stop myself from getting churchy by writing about blessings and possibly the Mormons, I’m ending this post. And I’m gonna drink a beer and maybe smoke a cigar.
Seriously Gay 
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